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13 Reasons the Indonesian Police is the Best in the World

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Even though the Indonesian Police is receiving some bad press occasionally, I thought it was time to celebrate their work and ethic through a short illustrated post. I haven't traveled that much in the world, but it seems fair to me to say that the Indonesian Police could be among the best in the planet.

Here are 13 reasons why:

The Indonesian Police is particularly compassionate towards the sick and the elderly.

Pakubuwono XIII is thanking the police for its understanding
In 2015, the King of Solo was asked to provide a DNA sample so the police could check if he raped a 16 years old woman. Unfortunately, the King was feeling unwell that day. The Police understood the situation and dropped the case altogether, allowing one very sick man to remain free. More on the Jakarta Globe: Sick Solo King No Show For Questioning.

The Indonesian Police is a role model for many people who want to be super-heroes.

Angry Mobs are part of Indonesia's folklore
America has Batman, Britain has James Bond, Indonesia has "Angry Mobs". Angry mobs are even better than superheroes: They find the guilty people, they make a trial on the spot, and they execute the sentence. In most cases, the super power of the mob is gasoline but it can also be the mastering of ropes, sticks and knobs. Read more about it in the Economist: Lynching in Indonesia.

The Indonesian Police is not afraid of taking risks.

The bullet-proof vest proved very useful in this high-risk case
In February 2015, the Surabaya Police cracked down on illegal possession of Valentine chocolates and sweets. Even better, they seized condoms from couples who were consenting adults just about to make love. Rest assured, they all went to jail for your very own safety. Read more about it in the Jakarta Globe: Lovers Detained for Doing The Nasty Thing

The Indonesian Police is efficient.

Only Teh Botol and Teh Kotak permitted 
On April 22nd, 2015, it took 60 policemen to seize 20 bottles of alcohol during a citywide raid. According to my sources, 5 Policemen were carrying 4 bottles each and the remaining 55 were assigned to smoking cigarettes. How lucky we are that the police cares some much about health issues. Read more in The Jakarta Post: Police Raid Minimart.

Photo : Budhi Firmansyah Surapati / Beritajakarta.Com

The Indonesian Police is not afraid to admit its mistakes.

That was the picture before Daddy came to visit
Don't you hate people who never admit their mistakes? Indonesian Police is just the contrary. On January 20th 2015, Christopher Daniel Sjarif lost control of his car, killed 4 people and flew the scene. The urine tests came back positive for LSD and the driver himself confessed to taking drugs. Yet, a few days later, the Police said they made a mistake and that the drivers should be released as it was just a "pure accident". Christopher can certainly be happy that the police is not afraid to admit when it is wrong. Read more on the Jakarta Globe: Police Confused About LSD Suspect.

The Indonesian Police protects the innocent child.

The outrageous Panda jumper mobilized Mangga Besar police for a week

As most people, you are truly shocked by the indecent jumper shown in the picture above. Even though it does not really exist and it was just part of a joke, the Indonesian Police preferred to take this issue as seriously as possible and asked for the public's vigilance to prevent anyone from wearing it. Complete story on the DailyMail: Police Warning for Indecent Panda Jumper.

The Indonesian Police is made of angels.

The Police assured the test does not discriminate against women 
Only virgins are accepted in the Indonesian Police force. This makes sense because its moral is so pure that it cannot be corrupted by anyone who had intercourse. We all know that the 250,000,000 Indonesians that populate the country were all created without sexual intercourse. Read more on CNN: Virginity Test for Police Officers.

©Adek Berry (AFP/File)

The Indonesian Police is tremendously respected.

Policemen protecting the shade of a parking lot
The Indonesian people sees its Police force as a perfect example of honesty. In fact, almost 8% of the respondents of a Transparency International 2014 survey estimated that the country's Police Force is not corrupt. That's better than Pakistan and almost as good as Zimbabwe. Only some silly minds complain from time to time but it does not take long before they realize their mistake and apologize. Read more on the Jakarta Globe: Adrianus Apologizes for Calling National Police Corrupt.

Photo Source: Reuters

The Indonesian Police knows how to have fun.

Now who wants weed?
Just like anybody, some Indonesian policemen enjoy a little party and some drugs to blow off steam when needed. The good thing is that unlike other citizens, they don't have to worry too much about going to jail. More in the Jakarta Globe: Police Cuff Officer to Flagpole.

The Indonesian Police is capable of empathy, forgiveness and understanding.

Ahmad Dhani with good pal Himmler
Ahmad Dhani gave his 13 years old son a Mitsubishi Lander as a present. The boy was safely driving at 180 km/hour until it collided with two cars and killed 7 people. The Police concluded there was no wrongdoing on neither Dhani or his son's side and closed the case without charging anybody. Indonesians are so lucky that their Police understood that no one should be blamed for this insignificant matter. Read more on Jakarta Globe: Ahmad Dhani Not Charged.

The Indonesian Police knows about drugs that no other Police in the World knows.

The Policeman on the right is carrying the magic stone in his right hand
While rapists in Europe can keep abusing children as they please, Indonesian Police has discovered a new drug called "Magic Stone" that enables them to make more convictions of rapists. This drug was used by Neil Bantleman from Jakarta International School to rape kids in a "Secret Room" that only the Indonesian Police is able to perceive. Read more on the Jakarta Globe: Police Accuse JIS Teachers of Using Magic Stone.

Photo source: Adi Weda/European Pressphoto Agency

The Indonesian Police is generous.

Come on, come closer from the fire
In March 2015, the Police of Tangerang seized 3,3 tons of Marijuana. After much discussion, they decided that the best way to give back to the community was to make a big open air fire with it so everyone could feel high, free of charge. Read more in the Daily Mail: Entire Tangerang Town Get High.

The Indonesian Policemen are true believers.


In December 2014, the Jakarta Post published a cartoon that was criticizing ISIS in Iraq. The police could not accept that because the word Allah was in the cartoon so they summoned the Jakarta Post editor for questioning. They will not let anyone spread blasphemy. It is good to know that smart people are defending religions. Read More in the National Post: Indonesian Newspaper Accused of Blasphemy.

And finally, the Indonesian Police is fluent in English and knows how to give clear instructions to citizens:
With so many qualities, it is only normal that Indonesian Police officers, especially high ranking ones, receive a fair compensation for their work. I am scandalized when I read people complaining because Budi Gunawan, currently the number 2 Chief Police in the country earned 7,2M USD during his 2-year tenure as head of the Police Career Development. That's only 300,000 USD per month. I don't believe this money could have been better used.

First picture source: Aditia Noviansyah

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